Describe the behavior you have observed

A perception checking statement is a message you create to check your understanding of someone’s words or behavior.
The benefits of perception checking statements include:
a) helping us decode messages more accurately: Our goal is mutual understanding
b) reducing defensiveness & the potential for conflict: helps us avoid assuming too much.
Perception Checking has 3 parts:
1. Descriiption – provide a descriiption of the behavior you noticed.
2. Interpretation – provide two possible interpretations of the behavior.
3. Clarification – request clarification from the person about the behavior & your interpretations.
Perception Checking Example 1
1. a) Descriiption of behavior noticed
When you walked out of the room without saying “goodbye…”
b) Two possible interpretations of behavior
“I didn’t know if you were mad at me”
“or if you were in a hurry and forgot.”
c) Request for clarification
“What was up?”
2. Perception Checking Example 2
a) Descriiption of behavior noticed
“You haven’t called in the few days”
b) Two possible interpretations of behavior
“I am not sure whether you’re upset with me or you’ve been busy?”
c) Request for clarification
“What’s going on?”
Assignment on next page.
This assignment will have you practice the skill of perception checking. Be sure to describe and not evaluate the behavior. Then provide the interpretations you have and request clarification.
A good friend from your workplace has not joined you for your regular lunchtime walks during the past three days even though you’ve left her messages to let her know that you miss her and would like for her to join you for a stroll. She usually responds to your messages or walks with you. Recently, she hasn’t responded. In the space below, try typing out a perception check regarding this situation.
1. Describe the behavior you have observed
2. Provide at least two possible interpretations of the behavior
3. Ask for clarification
Type out your draft of a perception check here.
A best friend with whom you have shared all of your secrets for years has recently changed when around you. The former casual conversations about school and home have not been the same; and on occasion you’ve had to talk up and/or repeat what you previously said a couple of times just to grab his/her attention.
1. Describe the behavior you observed
2. Provide at least two possible interpretations of the behavior
3. Ask for clarification
Type out your draft of a perception check here.

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