Why would she allow someone to treat her this way?

According to the world health organization “about 1 in 3 (30%) of women worldwide have been subjected to either physical and/or sexual intimate partner violence or non-partner sexual violence in their lifetime”. These stats were merely numbers to me and one I wasn’t included in them until the age of sixteen. I remember being 11 years old and having an older cousin, who was constantly abused by her now husband. I kept thinking to myself “Why would she allow someone to treat her this way?”. “Why doesn’t she love herself enough to know that she deserves better?”. I remember vowing to myself that it would never be me. If it’s one thing life has taught me thus far, is that it’s easy to say what you would and wouldn’t do when you’re not actually in a situation. I’ve also learned that it’s easy to have an opinion on almost everything when you’re on the outside looking in.
I grew up in a very loving home with extremely supportive parents. They never argued or raised their voices in the front of my brother and me. We always said, “I love you”, we always showed loved. My dad was/is my greatest example of how I should allow anyone to treat me. Gentle but strong, and the true definition of how a man should treat a woman. He was mostly absent because of work but he always made sure we we’re provided for and had everything we needed. So how did I become another statistic? you may ask. Unfortunately, I found myself trying to see the best in men who didn’t see anything in themselves. I kept thinking if I gave one more chance, they’ll get it right and this time would be different. I kept thinking I can change people. I can’t elaborate enough on how I felt deep down inside that every time would be the last.
I was verbally, physically, and mentally abused by men-two, from the age of sixteen. My first real relationship ending in mandatory court counseling for abuse. Which most would’ve considered a shocking ending to how it began. Constant phone calls, hour long conversations, being in each other’s presence 24/7. I guess, its safe to say that problems only started when we weren’t around each other. This was due to the fact that I got a job working at a tennis store. This, obviously meant that I would be spending less time with him

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